Monday, November 7, 2011

Catchin' a dream

Dream Catchers

Dreams have been on my mind this week.

Good dreams. Bad dreams.
Day dreams. Night dreams.
Dream symbols. Dream jumpers.
Dream Walkers.

Chocolate Dream Cake or rather dreamin' of chocolate cake instead?

My former husband used to say to me he could tell I had a good dream when I woke up. He'd roll over & look at me and say,"I can tell you were dreaming about eating at a banquet hall that had tables full of roast pig & poi & cakes & cookies. You look full."

(It's true I did dream happy dream quite often back in those days. But I was never alone eating at that buffet table & it always was good grinds!)

When I was pregnant with Tafi,  I had a dream about being chased down the road from my house behind the ASPA powerplant in Tafuna to the Army Reserves Center by an 12ft chocolate bar that was shouting at me,"EAT ME!" 

I've recounted that story to my son many times. He laughs about it. Even now Tafi tells me I shoulda ate it!

"Really, Mommy? You ran from a chocolate bar?"
"Well, Taf ~ he was like 12 feet tall & chasing me screaming Eat me! What else was I going to do but run away?"
"You shoulda ate him Mommy. I would've."

I was terrified of chocolate bars for a very long time! (Well okay maybe just a week. We are talking chocolate after all.)

Like I said dreams have been on my mind.

What do you dream about? Do you dream in color? Can you hear sounds? Are there smells in your dreams?

I dream myself back to Samoa.

Back to Aua, a place that I am not from but where I've become an adopted sister of one who is blood-tied to that place. She is one of those stalwart people who ties run deep & true. She doesn't speak of her love for her land & people but its there in everything she does every day. She thinks that I don't know & she thinks that other people don't know it. But I do & so do they.

My eldest son has blood ties to that village & its people.

I dream of walking along the sandy roadside & looking across the water & seeing Fatu ma Futi & Ututlei beach & the Port Authority just before dawn when the sky lightens but the sun hasn't crossed the horizon. There are no cars on the road.  I can smell the whisper of smoke coming from a neighbor's umu beginning. I think to myself, it must be Sunday. Why else would they be doing a umu so early?

And to Fogagogo. There's a road that leads down to where the clam fisheries are. Before you hit that DMWR building, there's another dirt road leading off to the left of it that goes down another half mile & the it breaks out to a spot overlooking a steep cliff & then wild ocean.

I dream of Faleniu at sunset, when the cool evening shadow falls from the mountain. I hear dogs barking, chickens wrestling with each other & pigs oinking noisily for their dinner. I see the children sitting on the graves laughing sweetly & making jokes & throwing rocks at each other. I hear the aiga bus blaring its country western gospel rap songs as it comes over the bridge & around the bend in the road. Idiot bus driver - who the hell takes a turn like that driving 65 miles an hour?

Sometimes I dream myself to Mapusaga Fou where my Uncle's house is. I walk down a muddy dirt road & through the banana patches. Its almost always noon day there because I can feel the sun shine hot & strong on my back. After I'm done walking around in what I'm sure are other people's plantations ~ I almost always find myself staring at the talo saying to myself, I wish I brought my spade with me to dig it up. Its just about ready.

Today I miss Samoa terribly. I even miss the cranky grouchy old witches who used to cackle at me & call out to me muli oso (which I translated literally means jumping ass or ass that jumps or whatever - its meaning isn't a nice one) or muli pipi ( again with the literal translation turkey tail or turkey ass. Can we all just agree that my ass was the source of much name calling & much salacious semi-illegal scandalous wonderings?)

Dreaming is really great until you have to wake up & find that home isn't where you are at but where you're heart is.

with Love & delicious dreaming~

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